Het PC master race

Luister ik hou van games, ik kan er helemaal in op gaan. Al zal ik eerlijk zijn en bekennen dat het de laatste jaren wel iets minder is geworden. Met de meiden is het huis een stuk drukker en in de avond heb ik liever een filmpje, rust en wijn. Ik kan je die killer combinatie aanrader als moeder.  Alleen er is wel een ding.

Ik ben een luie console gamer vol rage en mijn vriend een kalme, actieve PC gamer en daar zit een kink in de kabel.

Hier gaat het gewoon soms even mis. Ik heb diverse consoles staan en ik ben dol op ze allemaal. Allemaal hebben ze een eigen kwaliteit of game die ik specifiek op die console graag speel. Zeker in de wintermaanden game ik meer. Ik game alleen in fases. Dan heel veel dan weer een tijd niets.

Op de iPad speel ik heel graag hidden object games en dat is ook een van de weinige spellen die ik nog op de PC speel.

Ik heb namelijk een tik. Ik ben een RAGE gamer. Ik heb geen geduld en waar ik vroeger veel speelde op de PC als 16 jarige puber en dol was op first person shooters en strategie spellen, speel ik nu liever hidden object games. Mijn jus is op. Ik ben oud.

Rustig een verhaaltje door, puzzeltjes spelen. Helemaal prima. Zo min mogelijk agressie en kans op kapotte items. Big Fish is my jam hierin. Mijn iPad staat vol met dit soort spellen. (check zeker even de dark parables collectie als je ook van hidden object games en sprookjes houdt.)

Meneer daarentegen speelt van alles en deelt dit graag met mij. Hij en meerdere mensen zien mij graag nieuwe spellen proberen en zien mij het allerliefste boos worden op een computer.

Dit begon nadat hij de rage verhalen hoorde over WOW, ik die tekeer ga tijdens Mortal Kombat op de PS4, of tijdens Mario Kart op de WiiU. Ik ben in staat dingen door de kamer te smijten, te springen op kussens en te vloeken als een bootwerker.

Nadat Meneer mij tijdens Sherida haar zeer ontspannende game “Beyond Eyes”  heeft zien flippen omdat ik ergens niet uit kwam was het klaar. Hij was helemaal into it.

Hoe laten we Linda ragen. Belangrijker hoe kunnen we dit op camera krijgen?

Laten we wel wezen “Left 4 dead”  in teamverband is niet een spel voor mij. Bij mij ben je gewoon de sigaar. Ik laat je lekker creperen terwijl ik als een idioot een spel door ren om weg te komen van monsters die mij willen killen. Ieder voor zich. Dit gaat al vloekend ala “nope, nee, oprotten, nope”  en rammend op de toetsen. Want op de een of andere manier krijg ik niet meer de toetsencombinaties goed in mijn rage.

Dit filmpje demonstreert Linda in een gevecht. Look at me go

Portal, FUCK YOU. simpel. Begin is ok, maar waarom laat je mij die moeite doen. Nee, ik ben klaar. Ik ga niet 100 uur deze puzzels doen.

Dota. Dota is nog redelijk vermakelijk al kan ik daar ook soms boos om worden. Zeker als ik daar in mijn eentje een pad sta te verdedigen en IEDEREEN ineens pleite is wanneer de hele tegenpartij mij aanvalt. STERF. Wij zijn hierna geen vrienden meer, jij verrader.

Van World of Warcraft krijg ik helemaal de kriebels. Daar kan ik een hele blogpost aan wijden. Dit is niet eens een grap. Ik heb zelfs voor dit spel betaald. Dit spel maakt mij zo ongelofelijk kwaad.  Zeker als je klote beesten moet doden. Daar sta je dan in een bos met 9 beesten, je moet er 11 doden en er zijn nog 20 man bezig met dezelfde missie. Die respawn tijden, en laat mij alsjeblieft niet beginnen over “corpse running”

Toch speel ik telkens weer spellen waarmee vriendlief aan komt. Probeer deze is, probeer deze is, “Ah, Lin toe?” Vorige keer betrapte ik hem op het stiekem mij proberen te filmen. Screw you..

Wederom ik denk aan “twitch”  maar mijn vloek tirades online gooien daar sta ik nog niet helemaal lekker in. Wie weet doe ik het. Wie weet niet. We zien het wel. Ik kan er wel mijn agressie in kwijt. Is er behoefte aan een gratis cursus creatief taalgebruik?

Nu zitten we met het tweede probleem. Ik heb een vriendje waarmee ik normaal wel eens lekker kon babbelen in de avond. Not anymore….we zijn samen ons eerste jaar door en Skyrim is opnieuw uit.

Nee vriendlief speelt nu Skyrim. Vriendlief heeft het druk. Eerst Dota met vrienden daarna ontspannen met Skyrim. En Skyrim bekijken snap ik al niet.

Liggen daar een paar lijkjes op een soort yoga mat in een kerker dood te spelen en als ze aanvallen dan heb je pijlen. PIJLEN, in een grot voor close combat. Nee! Dan heb je een tijdelijke compagnon of iets dergelijks die kan veranderen in een steroïden weerwolf waar ze in Twilight jaloers op kunnen zijn en ALLES kan doden in zijn weg maar nee, dat doet hij niet dat is te makkelijk he? Nee, hij loopt voor je neus als je probeert te schieten, flikker een eind op, Dolfje Weerwolfje.

Gelukkig heb ik mijn boeken, series en hidden object games. Of Sims. Misschien moet ik gewoon weer eens beginnen met huizen bouwen en inrichten, want dat is een van de leukste dingen aan heel het sims gebeuren. Ok, laten we eerlijk zijn, poppetjes creatief killen hebben we ook allemaal wel eens gedaan. Misschien moet ik Trump maken en hem in een huis met alleen muren zetten. Zoveel opties, zoveel keuzes.

Ik heb nog geen idee maar ik denk niet dat ik ooit zal behoren tot het zogenaamde PC master race hoezeer Meneer het ook probeert. Geef mij maar de nieuwe mini NES die uitgekomen is, daar krijg ik het nu warm van. Is de Sint niet toevallig in het land?

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  1. OMG YES L4D!! Ik vind dat ZOOO een geweldige game! Ragen is juist dikke fun! Heerlijk schreeuwen tegen je scherm en medespelers! Vooral witches uitschakelen, ik loop er liever omheen, mijn vriend schiet ze liever in de nek en je hebt je volgende ragepartij klaar wanneer het mislukt ? Nu speel ik Batman Arkham Knight (I love it) en Witcher 3, misschien moet je deze eens proberen! Super goede verhaallijnen en geweldige gameplay. Ik zit nu ook weer in een gamefase (nu zeurt tenminste niemand aan mijn hoofd dat ik ‘binnen zit met dit lekkere weer’) ?

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