Corona en thuis scholing

Ik zie overal op Facebook en in de familieapp van mijn partner prachtige schoolschema’s omhoog komen. Moeders die de hele dag inroosteren en vol als juf inspringen. Ik bewonder ze en ik heb veel respect voor deze ouders.

Ik ben dat niet.
Ik heb er namelijk oprecht moeite mee.

Het begon zondag met de mededeling dat de scholen drie weken zouden gaan sluiten. Die avond belde de lerares van mijn oudste dochter op. Ze weet dat ik in de zorg werk en dat hun vader op dit moment niet de kinderen kan opvangen door het ziektebed van zijn vrouw. Ze valt in de risicogroep en daarmee komen de kinderen dus op mij.

Niets aan het handje, komt goed. De school ging alles regelen betreffende opvang en we zouden er samen wel uitkomen. Ook wilde ze weten of ik een computer thuis had voor huiswerk. Ik meldde dat ik alles in huis had maar dat ik wel gewoon moest werken en dat mijn diensten onregelmatig zouden zijn.

Maandag had ik hetzelfde gesprek met de lerares van de jongste. De opvang zou mij bellen maar zolang de jongste nog verkouden is mag ze hoe dan ook niet naar de opvang. Die heb ik gelukkig voor de eerste week al privé geregeld zodat ik door kon werken. Ook meldde ik haar dat ik niet elke dag om half 9 met mijn dochter kon zitten voor huiswerk. Wederom “dit komt goed, kijk gewoon hoe ver je komt”

Dinsdagavond kreeg de oudste dochter een programma door met digitale werkjes zodat ze door kon gaan. Ze kreeg haar eind musical script via de mail zodat ze deze door kon lezen en een rol kon uitzoeken. Ze ging direct thuis aan de slag. Al het huiswerk was die avond meteen klaar.

Ze kreeg ook nog als opdracht dat ze verder zou kunnen met haar spreekbeurt de komende dagen. Nu was ze met haar vader de afgelopen tijd aan de gang gegaan voor haar spreekbeurt. Deze opdracht liet ik dan ook maar even voor wat het is.

Woensdagmiddag lag het netwerk voor mijn oudste dochter er al uit door de vele aanmeldingen van die dag. Mijn zusje is uiteindelijk met mijn puber haar musical gaan uitpluizen om een rol uit te zoeken. Mijn oudste dochter was al helemaal gelukkig om even weg uit het huis te zijn van iedereen. Ook dit geeft nogal een druk (hier later nog een blog over want…ik heb het zwaar)

Vervolgens kon ik zelf snel het schoolwerk en de schoolboeken ophalen van mijn jongste telg, zodat deze ook aan de slag kon. Ik kreeg nog een Chromebook mee om eventueel op te werken bij de opvang. Deze school gaat aan de slag in Google Hangouts, de juffen geven om half 9 elke dag het werk op en er kunnen vragen gesteld worden. Ook mijn mini dame ging direct aan de slag en opende het voorgestelde schema vanuit de leraren.

Ga uit van ongeveer 2 tot 3 uur werk. Het is rekenen, lezen alles erop en eraan. Gymles. Filmpjes en extra werk. Fantastisch geregeld. Je ziet hoe hard de leraren hebben gewerkt om dit werkend te maken.

Ondertussen besloot de dansschool van mijn jongste dochter ook hun lessen digitaal te sturen zodat kinderen door konden gaan. De vader van de kinderen stuurde mijn vervolgens de link zodat ik daar eventueel ook nog wat mee kon.

Nee. Gewoon nee. Het spijt mij. Ik kan dit niet.

Nu verwacht men dat ik werk, een juf ben voor mijn kinderen, gymles geef, dansles geef EN ondertussen moet mijn huishouden ook nog doordraaien.

Ik ben ook nog een moeder die gewoon even wil ontspannen mijn mini mensjes zonder al die druk. Ik wil als mens gewoon in de avond lekker hangen met een glas wijn en even helemaal niets.

Ik ben geen supermens. Ik kan dit niet allemaal doen en tegelijkertijd niet gek worden. Geef mij wat ruimte alsjeblieft. I’m really trying here.

Ik werk. Ik ben bezig. Mijn kinderen gaan normaal gesproken naar school toe. Op school krijgen ze les als ik werk. Thuis maken we huiswerk en overhoor ik de meiden voor de volgende dag. Ik vertrouw op de leraren om mijn kinderen te scholen. Mijn wens om lerares te worden is vervlogen toen ik 19 jaar oud was.

Ja er is voor mensen in cruciale beroepen kinderopvang beschikbaar. Alleen mijn kinderen zijn verkouden en mogen dus niet hier naartoe. Een snotter of een kuch en de opvang vervalt. Mijn werk niet. Ik mag alleen stoppen als ik ziek ben of als ik koorts krijg. Ik ben zelf ook enigszins verkouden. Dat is geen reden op dit moment om te stoppen. En nu?

Met andere woorden; “mijn” kinderopvang komt nu even neer op de mensen om mij heen. Dat zijn mijn helden nu.

Ik ben dankbaar dat ze er zijn. Ik ben blij dat mijn zusje riep “Stuur ze maar even hier heen” Dat mijn vader bij mij sliep om de meiden op te vangen. Dat hij een paar dagen vrij nam. Dat mijn vriend hier bij mij thuis zich suf werkt dat ook hij een oogje op ze kan houden als ik niet anders kan, terwijl dat enorm veel druk op onze relatie zet nu.

Gelukkig vangen deze mensen om mij heen nu ook deels het huiswerk op. Ik vertel iedere ochtend voordat ik ga wat er gedaan dient te worden zodat ik het in de avond weer naar de leraren kan communiceren. De mensen om mij heen helpen de meiden als er vragen zijn. Mijn zusje appte mij al met staartdeling stress. Haar jeugdtrauma betreffende wiskunde kwam ook weer omhoog. We maken het allemaal werkende maar niet op zo een prachtige manier zoals ik overal terug zie bij andere gezinnen. Het is meer “maak je werk direct en daarna luister je naar bij wie je bent en ga je wat doen”

Ik heb ondertussen ook geleerd dat ik als juf strenger ben. Zeker na een uitgebreide preek ala “Mama werkt en moet door, jullie werken en gaan door” Als mijn diensten klaar zijn, stap ik binnen en lopen we het huiswerk. door. Geen gemekker, geen gezeur. Dan pak ik de zorg weer vol over.

Zodra de opvang hier draait, ga ik er wel van uit dat ze daar ook huiswerk maken en dit overnemen. Ik ben alleen nog steeds niet gebeld voor de opvang. Deze is namelijk nog niet rond in Velsen. Ook dit is logisch met het gekkenhuis, we moeten geduld hebben met elkaar.

*Insert donderdagmiddag: Ondertussen is er contact geweest met de opvang. Nu kan de opvang mijn kinderen niet opvangen omdat beide dochters verkouden zijn. (dat viel te verwachten) Ze zitten alleen op twee verschillende locaties ivm twee verschillende scholen wat nu niet handig is.

*Insert vrijdagochtend: Kinderopvang is geregeld als ik het nodig heb op 1 locatie. Ook zullen ze daar het huiswerk kunnen doen. BAM. We komen er wel.

Ik ben blij dat de scholen een systeem in werking hebben gezet voor alle kinderen. Ik ben dankbaar dat ik mensen om mij heen heb die kunnen helpen. Ik heb bewondering voor moeders die zich nu ontpoppen als volle manager van hun kinderen.

Ik begrijp simpel gezegd de druk op de ouders en kinderen nu even niet. Iedereen zit al zo vol in de stress. Een week of twee geen schoolwerk gaan de kinderen niet kapot van. Sterker nog, in de meivakantie krijgen de kinderen vaak geen werk mee. Dan mogen ze vakantie vieren en ‘lees een boek’. Kinderen kunnen ook andere dingen leren. Help maar in het huis. Kookles. Leer wat praktische zaken die je later nodig hebt in het leven.

Mijn puber uit groep 8 is al toegelaten op een middelbare school. De komende weken gaat het verschil niet meer maken. Mijn jongste dame uit groep 7 heeft eerder veel vragen over Corona en wil mij het liefst helpen met alles. Die vraagt letterlijk of ze niet beter mee kan met mijn werk om een verschil te maken in plaats van een pagina minsommen of 30 minuten lezen in haar boek.

Ja, er moet absoluut een systeem zijn voor de lange termijn. Het is geweldig dat we dit blijkbaar redelijk snel op orde kunnen krijgen in Nederland. Het is goed om de kinderen een gevoel te geven van normaliteit en ritme. Dat ben ik helemaal met iedereen eens. De leraren en scholen hebben iets fantastisch neergezet in een korte tijd. Ik heb gezien hoe hard de leraren aan de gang zijn gegaan.

Ik vind alleen dat er teveel druk op staat.

Er gebeurd nogal veel bij iedereen thuis. Het land zit in quarantaine. Mensen zijn bang. Bang om ziek te worden. Bang voor hun baan. Gezinnen zitten thuis op elkaars lip. Er zijn meer zaken van huiselijk geweld. Er zijn meer scheidingsaanvragen. Geef iedereen even wat ademruimte.

Zorg dat de opvang soepel loopt. Zorg dat de ouders zelf hun thuiswerk situatie goed hebben opgezet. Dat iedereen wat kalmer is en begin dan langzaam met te kijken wat werkt.

Mensen hamsteren wc papier uit paniek terwijl ze het niet nodig hebben. Dat zijn de mensen die je nu wil laten lesgeven. Geef iedereen even een moment van bezinning.

Sorry, mijn hoofd loopt over. Het moet er bij mij ook even uit.

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